British TV reviews and so much more. I've really just about had it with all you scumbags. Aerial Telly forever - worthless Twitter groupie slime never.
"a depressing but brilliant read.... a superbly written manifesto for nothing." Daniel Hart
You know how it is when you look to expose the media circus and you just end up contributing to it? True Stories do. The Trials Of Amanda Knox was a broadly sympathetic look at the murdering thong enthusiast and post-mortem cartwheel queen. Garfield Kennedy's documentary followed the Knox family through the trial, hoping to get to know the Amanda you don't read about in the papers - the quirky, anything-but-conventional but essentially decent linguistic student with a lust for life and a twinkle in her eye. Did you know, for example, that she got the nickname Foxy Knoxy for her soccer playing skills? You did? OH.
"Family and friends all maintain that she's a swell gal with a tender heart who just happened up at the wrong murder scene at the wrong time (when the murder was taking place with her doing it, possibly while frigging herself silly)."
Kennedy interviews Knox's weird parents, idiot stepfather, ex-borefriend, best (i.e. only) friend and they all maintain that she's a swell gal with a tender heart who just happened up at the wrong murder scene at the wrong time (when the murder was taking place with her doing it, possibly while frigging herself silly). You hate to be the one to say it but they would say that wouldn't they?
So let's say it loud and say it proud: Amanda Knox is not innocent in this case. What she's actually guilty of is open to question but she is definitely involved in this murder and definitely knows exactly what happened. The longer her bullshit denials go on the more likely her role in Kercher's killing was a central one. Forensic experts agree that more than one person killed Meredith given the position of her wounds and that the absence of hair or skin under her fingernails shows she didn't fight back. So it wasn't just Rudy Guede - can we think of someone else who might be involved? Who might that be, Knoxy? Come on - give us a clue in your Aids diary.
"Instead, she throws Patrick Lumumba under the bus, lies through her tits, offers no consistent account of her movements and generally acts like a mentalloid murdering freak"
As ever with Amanda Knox apologists there was a lot of focus on the media's role in the case, notably the supposed demonisation of the Fox - how she was portrayed as a sex crazed slutbag, a drug addled Satan worshipper, whatever. All which is of biographical interest to the completist but let's not kid ourselves. If Knox tells the truth from the beginning she makes this irrelevant. She either i) confesses to killing Meredith or ii) comes up with an authentic alibi and exonerates herself. Instead, she throws Patrick Lumumba under the bus, lies through her tits, offers no consistent account of her movements and generally acts like a mentalloid murdering freak. No amount of positive media spin is going to get around that.
True crime freaks dream about cases like this1. Rarely do you get so many exciting elements coming together at once. Implausibly pretty protagonists, a United Nations of central players, sex, race, drugs, violence, death, all on motherfucking Halloween. You really couldn't write it better. And at the centre of it all, as she always was, is the gorgeous glass-eyed smiling cipher that is Amanda Knox.
"And here's the thing, Foxy. You're not in prison because you're pretty, sexual, female or American. You lied about where you were. You staged the break-in in the bedroom.You tried to get an innocent man sent to prison for life."
And here's the thing, Foxy. You're not in prison because you're pretty, sexual, female or American. You lied about where you were. You did cartwheels at the police station after your supposed friend's brutal murder. You lied about not remembering what happened that night. You changed your story so often even you can't keep track of your lies. You staged the break-in in the bedroom. You seduced a boy so irredeemably pussy he would likely never even talk to a girl and two weeks later he is arrested for murdering one.2 You tried to get an innocent man sent to prison for life.
When you look at it like that it all makes sense, chuck.
The best thing about it: I always love reading Foxy's diaries
The worst thing about it: Idiot Knox supporters being idiots.
1 Aerial Telly, apropos THIS, is one Britain's leading true crime aficionados. He told you the McCanns were innocent and he was proven correct; he told you Patsy Ramsey killed JonBenet, wrote the ransom note then lied about it like a cunt for 10 years and now everyone of consequence agrees; he told you Oswald alone, not some nebulous ever-changing conspiracy, killed Kennedy and the facts once again backed him up. Only fools and the mentally ill doubt him.
2 Not exonerating Raffaele Sollecito here. He's a big boy, a worthless cocksucker and 100% responsible for his part in the murder. Just saying, if he doesn't meet the American he's playing happy sack with his Korean roomie in Perugia right now, not tossing salads with his Sardinian blew-me in the slammer AND HOW.
