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REVIEWS | A-B | C-D | E-I | J-M | N-R | S-T | U-Z | MISC


Jericho

Jericho

CBS

So was Threads just a load of bollocks then? I only ask because post-nuclear America doesn't seem to be all that bad. With 24 villains detonating suitcase nukes left, right and centre and every one 1 getting on with their everyday lives you start to wonder if the whole nuclear holocaust scenario was just abject scaremongering from malcontents. The feeling is compounded by Jericho, which depicts the goings-on in a small Kansas town in the aftermath of a nuclear onslaught on America. If you expected bleeding gums, hair falling out and fourth degree burns then you couldn't be more wrong. Sure, the power and communications are knocked out but even they come back on after a while. Resources are short, you can't get reception on your TV set and there's a lot of people milling around crying. It's a lot like present day Wolverhampton.

"Resources are short, you can't get reception on your TV set and there's a lot of people milling around crying. It's a lot like present day Wolverhampton."

The focus of the show is the Green family - recently returned prodigal son Jake Green seems to have a military background and half a clue what's going on. Daddy Johnston Green is the town's mayor and older son Eric is married but fucking the local barmaid. Mommy Green is a boot faced old sow who annoys me frequently. Recently arrived resident Robert Hawkins, turns out to be a CIA man who had prior knowledge of the attacks.

"Shoshannah Stern is a nice curvy piece of deaf pie and despite being a bit of a mush mouth almost certainly just lives to suck cock."

News reports are patchy and unreliable but the upshot is that 23 American cities have been nuked by terrorists, there's three or four different Presidents and there's something like 30 million dead. I think that must be where Threads comes in.

The lovely deaf cocksucker from Weeds turns up as a lovely deaf farm girl on Jericho. Shoshannah Stern is a nice curvy piece of deaf pie and despite being a bit of a mush mouth almost certainly just lives to suck cock. Which is just as well as there's not much else for a deaf girl to do in small-town post apocalypse America.

"Maybe it's just me but I'd be a lot happier if babies were being worn with three feet, an anvil for a head and immunity to all known disease."

20 episodes into its first season and we seem to be heading for quite a tense climax with war brewing between Jericho and a neighbouring town. Although audience ratings have been disappointing Jericho is a decent little show but it can leave you feeling very frustrated. They never seem to capitalise on the terror and panic you expect in freshly nuked America. The general impression you get is that there's a power cut in town and that we'll all pull through if we light a few candles and sing few verses of kum-bay-yah. Maybe it's just me but I'd be a lot happier if babies were being worn with three feet, an anvil for a head and immunity to all known disease. If Jericho does struggle its way into a second season if they should address this toot sweet.

The best thing about it: When they decide to step the action up, it can get very exciting .

The worst thing about it: Slips into Little House On The Prairie land too often .

The verdict on Jericho: We're not in Kansas any more, Toto.

Marks out of 10: 7

1 Everyone apart from the 13,000 dead. Suckers.


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REVIEWS (cont'd)

J-M

Jericho

John From Cincinnati

Jordan and Peter: Marriage And Mayhem

Joss Whedon's Dollhouse will be the greatest television show in history

Journeyman

jPod

Keys To The Vip

The Kill Point

Kings

King Of Shaves advert

Life

The Life and Times of Tim

Life on Mars

Lip Service

Live From Studio Five

Louie

Louis Theroux - The City Addicted to Crystal Meth

Loose Women

Lost

Lost Season 2

Lost Season 3 Finale

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Lost Season 3 Premiere

Lost Season 4 Half Term report

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Lost Season 6x09 - Ab Aeterno

Lost Series Finale

Luther

Luther Series One finale

Mad Men

Mad Men Season 2

Mad Men Season 2 Finale

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Mad Men Season 3 Finale

Mad Men Season 4

The Madness of Boy George

Mars Believe World Cup Campaign

Man vs Wild

Martina Cole's The Take

Mary Archer

The Mentalist

Mercy Series Premiere

Michael Carroll: King Of Chavs

Misfits

The Mitchell Brothers' Return

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Modern Family

Mongrels

Monkey Dust

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My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding

My Family

My Name Is Earl

My Penis And I

My Supermodel Baby

 

N-R

Nibble Nobby's Nuts adverts

Nigella

Neighbours 20th anniversary show

No Angels

No Heroics

Old Enough To Be His Mother

Oscars 2005

Only Yesterday - The Carpenters' Story

Pacific

Paradox

Party Animals

Party Down

The Persuasionists

Peaches Geldof: Teen America

Pete Burns' Cosmetic Surgery Nightmares

The Peter Serafinowicz Show

PhoneShop

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Pineapple Dance Studios

Preston's Walk Out on Never Mind The Buzzcocks

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Prison Break 2

Prison Break Season Two: half-term report

Prison Break Season Two Premiere

Prison Break Season Two Finale

Prison Break Season 4 Half Term Report

Pulling

Pulse

Pushing Daisies series premiere...

Richard and Judy

Rev

Rome Season One

S-T

Saxondale

The Secret Life of A Manic Depressive

The Secret Policemen's Ball

Seduction School: Size Doesn't Matter

Sex Addict

Seymour Butts

Shameless

Shameless Season 4

Shane

Sherlock

Sherlock series 1 finale: The Great Game

The Shield

The Shield - Season Five Finale

The Shield - Season 6

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Six Feet Under

Skins

Skins Season 2

Smoking Room

Sons of Anarchy

Sons of Anarchy Season 2 Premiere

The Sopranos Season 6

Space Cadets

Spartacus: Blood and Sand

Spartacus: Blood and Sand Season One Finale

The Spy Who Stole My Life

State of the TV Nation Address

Stepkids In Love

Strike Back

Studs of Suburbia

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Supernanny

Surviving Disaster

Take That... for the Record

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Ted Bundy - Natural Porn Killer

Terminator - The Sarah Connor Chronicles

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This Life +10

This World: Kidnap Cops

Top 30 TV Shows of 2010

Tower Block of Commons

Treme

True Stories - The Trials Of Amanda Knox

Too Ugly For Love

True Blood

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U-Z

Unanimous

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Vexed

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When Fearne Met Peaches

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World Cup Final 2010

The World Cup has been kidnapped and molested

World's Deadliest Gangs

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X Factor 2005

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40 Pupils Suspended For Bullying

606 with Danny Baker

Amazon Review Scum

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Floyd Mayweather v Carlos Manuel Baldomir

An Illustrated History of Dis

Fooled By Randomness

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Indie kids - munching on cock all day, every day, from now until forever

Listen up, douchebags: Larry Merchant KO1 murdering rapist hype merchant scum that constitute boxing's deal-making fight-avoiding turd elite

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Morales v Barrera III

Music Sounds Better With You(tube)

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Stan Collymore

The Streets

Vertigolf

War Winehouse!

We Expose Palace Security As A Bag Of Shite