Hannibal
Sky Living
In many ways an extension of the Silence of the Lambs franchise is about as welcome as the face full of cum FBI agent Clarice Starling receives from Multiple Miggs in Jonathan Dummey's 1991 movie. Prequels suck balls with alarming frequency so Bryan Fuller's look at Hannibal Lecter's early days is a risk for both network and viewer. In a happy twist it's one that pays off like the subsequent immediate suicide of Multiple Miggs and everyone is happy. Except Miggs – he's seen better days.
Hannibal
Broadchurch
ITV One
Hey, who's that lying dead on the beach? Why, it looks like 11-year-old Danny Latimer (Oskar McNamara) local resident of sleepy seaside community Broadchurch, Dorset. He's as washed-up as John Leslie's career and has taken a beating like Rihanna after Chris Brown discovered she was tickling Frank Ocean's balls with a peacock feather. His mother Beth (Jodie Whittaker) takes it badly and blames herself for not checking on her son the night before then most of all she blames her husband Andrew Buchan (Mark Latimer) for not checking on him the night before. They call Mark the plumber because he likes to lay pipe. And also because he's a plumber. Andy was out until 3 AM on an emergency call. OR WAS HE? Obviously not, that would be a bit too convenient. Also, see above re: laying pipe. Broadchurch
Mayday
BBC One
Mayday is the international distress signal. It is not to be confused with May Day, the festival held on the first day of May celebrating fertility and renewal. And yet Mayday takes place on May Day and presumably the intention is to squeeze some double meaning juice out of the distress caused by the May Day festival. It's certainly stressful for Richard Sutton (Richard Hawley) and his annoying wife Jo (Caroline Berry) when their teenage daughter Hattie (Leila Mimmack) goes missing. Hattie was to be the May Queen but when the May Queen float approaches people can't help but notice that there is a certain something missing, namely a May Queen. There's an empty throne where Hattie's maiden arse should be and when her bike is found abandoned by the woods people can only fear the worst. "Oh my God. It's a BBC original drama five-parter spread over a single week! Aaaaarrrrgh!" Mayday
Lightfields
ITV
You'll be familiar with the premise of the haunted premises. A Bad Thing happens in the past and it echoes down the generations like Jimmy Savile's 'uhuhuhuhuh' noise echoing down the corridors of Broadcasting House accompanied by the faint sound of children crying like that nausey Smiths songs about the Moors Murders. Well Lightfields is not going to depart significantly from that boilerplate. This is ITV and if you're looking for some kind of trailblazing reinvention of the ghost story and you can just fuck right off to BBC4 or your local arthouse cinema. What we do have is action from the 40s, 70s and present-day and it's all just a little bit cray. It's set in Suffolk which is fucking scary enough by itself. Lightfields
Spiral Series 4
BBC4
The question you are all asking as Spiral series 4 commences is "did Clément get to put his cock in Joséphine?" and from the first two episodes at least the jury is out on this one. Of course this is France where you only get a jury trial if the offence in question is likely to give you 15 years or more and while many men would gladly take 15 years jailtime to spend one night knocking the back out of Ms Karlsson, Pierre is a highly sought after, highly attractive male who doesn't need to chase around after the Red Menace like it's the only pumpum in town. Still and all even if you were the Parisian version of Chicago's most eligible bachelor list alumnus Will Gardner you totally absolutely would jump through a few hoops to take Joséphine for a few laps round the track. They are still in business together but in bed together? I'll get back to you on that one.
Spiral Series 4
Dancing on the Edge
BBC Four
When a wayward music journalist gave a bad review to a Dexys live gig that never took place on account of it being cancelled Kevin Rowland accosted the chump and delivered the kind of four-to-the-floor beating Sean Penn regularly dished out to veiny sexbore Madonna during their life threateningly tedious relationshit. So when, in Dancing on the Edge, 1930s music journo Stanley (Matthew Goode) rolls up to The Shitbox Tavern, Kilburn just as American jazz outfit The Louis Lester Band leave the stage you do wonder if he's going to say "fuck it", run his mouth in the press and risk a Rowland style mauling. Instead he asks Shitbox proprietor Deirdre (Caroline Quentin) what she thought of the humps. Real good, she says. That's good enough for Stanley who slips backstage and ride him sideways if The Louis Lester Band aren't all gentlemen of colour. This will certainly shake them up in stuffy 1930s Britain where the only reason we don't have segregation is because we shoot them on sight. Dancing on the Edge
The Americans
FX
The Cold War was confusing and boring to many at the time as it didn't feel like we had a personal stake in it. American teenagers returning in body bags from Vietnam hiti home. The IRA coming within an inch of assassinating Margaret Thatcher's Cabinet had meaning. But asset recruitment, surveillance and sleeper agents? It all seemed too remote. But how about those sleeper agents? Must've seemed pretty real to them, no? The Americans shows exactly how real. The Americans
The Following
Sky Atlantic
As befits a man named after a toilet Edgar Allen Po is one of those writers who manages to be regarded as literary without being particularly challenging – exactly the kind of writer literary professors hate in other words. Where's the fun in being a paid up member of the cultural elite when every kid educated up to the sixth grade can claim some knowledge of the literary canon? None whatsoever, my friends¹ and that is just the first of many reasons why The Following is very silly indeed. The Following
Bob Servant Independent
BBC Four
Brian Cox destroyed Deadwood along with a tailspinning David Milch and Aerial Telly has never forgotten it. We find him now on the East Coast of Scotland, Broughty Ferry specifically where the death of the local MP has triggered a by-election. Local burger van kingpin Bob Servant Independent (Cox) will be standing as a man-of-the-people candidate. So it's the little man taking on the political machine, putting people first and snatching the hearts of the public along the way? Not quite.Bob Servant Independent
Five reasons to watch Louie
The Observer, Sunday 13th January 2013
Critically lionised American show Louie finally makes it to British TV screens this week. The sitcom vehicle for comedian Louis CK, who plays a version of himself, the show has won a Primetime Emmy for its writing but is largely unheralded over here. So why the fuss and exactly why should you watch Louie? Louie
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